stressed but hopeful :/

so i am a firm believer in when you hit rock bottom the only place to go is up. but i am not naive enough to think that there wont be plenty of rocks to climb on the way up. it is a hard and tedious journey, but at the end it always feels worth it. i'm not quite at rock bottom but i keep falling. things keep stopping me on my path to what i want and its getting harder and harder for me to step over them.

money is an evil dirty thing, and for some reason it what powers the world. and yes, i stopped going to school after i got my 2 degrees, but there is no reason why i can't still be successful. but here i am working for pennies and struggling day to day to make ends meet. the economy sucks so finiding a new job is damn near impossible.

everyone throws out there opinion of what i should do and try this and if you did this. can i live?! i'm trying my hardest to make this work, and while me and jeremiah are both working so much, its putting a strain on our relationship. trust me, i'm still the happiest girl in the world, but it sucks when i can't see him. during the week he's gone before i wake up and asleep before i get home. and lately i've been picking up weekend shifts to make some extra money so i only get to see him for a few hours before i go to work on saturdays and sundays. its made us both snappier and cranky and it sucks.

and on top of that, i have no life. i have a couple great friends who i can talk to all the time, and of course my sisters and cousins jackie stephie lyssi and desi...they always help...but i don't do anything for me. i don't have fun, i don't hang out and laugh or just watch a movie. i have NO life. i work i sleep i clean i sleep i work i sleep i clean i work i sleep. its a viscious cycle.

nothing in life is free. including a great life. its hard work, its messy, its tiring, its not gentle in the least. but i'm willing to fight the big fight. i've made it through the past 6 years with all of the crazy things that have happened to me, and i don't plan on giving up now...not when i'm this far ahead.


daley inspiration for 12/19/08:
don't always believe the grass is greener on the other side. who knows, it could be dead. face one issue at a time in life, and you will find that not only will you do better at accomplishing things, you will not be as stressed doing them. just remember that you can only physically do so much. if 2 bills are due on the same day, work on paying off one and then the other. trying to come up with 2 at once is overwhelming. you can always set up a payment plan with one! there are more things in life to live for than just THINGS.